Reverse Shopping

One of my resolutions this year was to de-clutter my house to the extreme while avoiding bringing new items in. By de-cluttering, I mean I want things OUT of my house for good - not just packed up into storage. When we pack things away, we aren't getting rid of the problem; we're only shuffling it to a new location and hiding it in a container.

A lot of people suffer buyer's remorse when it comes time to part with items. We have those pangs of guilt -
"But I spent my hard-earned money on it!"
"I needed it at the time."
"I might need it again!"
All of those may be true, but so what? I suffered from all of those claims, and I finally came to several realizations. That money is already gone, you don't need it anymore, and if you do need it again, you can probably scrounge up another one.

Right now my family is very blessed by the fact that my husband has a secure job with a predictable paycheck, but we've been through enough times when that wasn't the case, so I hate the idea of wasting money, especially when I've already spent it. Rather than donate half the contents of my house, I decided to sell what I could to try to earn back some of what I'd spent. I call it "reverse shopping," and it's become rather addictive.

I used to do the standard yard sales - load it all up on tables, mark it cheap, and watch it get hauled away. But in the past couple of years, I've discovered Facebook garage sales. I just have to photograph everything, list it with a price, and meet the buyer who claims it. So far my transactions have been very smooth, and over 2 years, I've had about 300 transactions. I usually meet people at the grocery store, or if I know them, they stop by my house. I get more publicity since there are 11,000+ people in the garage sale group, and I can get a better price, especially for new items or groups of similar items.

I'm not money-hungry though, so I don't sell everything. In fact, I give a lot away to family and friends. I have also donated a lot to help local organizations. I'd rather see things really help someone than for me to get a few bucks from it. Selling so much has also helped me really learn the difference between "need" and "want," so items I think people may "need" often get donated first.

So how is this affecting my house? I've been clearing out every room and making space. I've even tackled the storage rooms I used at my parents' house, and I've cleared out almost everything from there except some Christmas decorations and baby clothes. And I haven't missed a thing. I had so much stuff that wasn't used on a daily basis, that I never fully realized I had it anyway. Now I'm down to a select number of clothes and kitchen utensils, and I use what I have every day. If it's in our house, it has a value. This reverse shopping has also helped decrease my desire to go out for conventional shopping. I don't want to bring things into my home if there's a possibility I'll have to get rid of it later.

How do you get rid of your things? Do you sell or donate?

When "Free" Is Too Good to Be True

You've heard about "extreme couponing:" people go into grocery stores armed with stacks of coupons and leave with carts full of groceries for just pennies. I used to do that. In fact, I used to be rather addicted to it.

After a year of marriage, we were cutting it close with our finances. We were able to pay our bills on time, but just barely. In my desperation one day, I Googled "how to live for free." Couponing sites started popping up, and I wondered how one could possibly live for free on coupons. In the 80s and early 90s, I had watched my mother clip coupons from the Sunday paper. She'd save 25 cents on potato chips or 15 cents on paper towels. That surely wasn't enough to pay my mortgage. But I looked into it. And the more I learned, the more I wanted to try it.

Using coupons today is a far cry different than it was 20 years ago. Today, coupons are often over $1, and they are everywhere for all major brands. Companies know that if someone tries a product purchased with a coupon, they can get hooked on it, so even when coupons disappear, the person will still want the product. They also know people love free things, so they intentionally allow customers to get items for free. The coupon usually won't say "free" on it, but if you have a $1 coupon for toothpaste, and that toothpaste is on sale for $1....you get the idea. But back to my story.

One of my "free" shopping trips in 2009.

I started gathering up coupons from friends, family, and neighbors. I would check the recycling bins for coupons that were carelessly discard. I'd even order them from coupon clipping sites and eBay. In the beginning, it seemed great. I was getting free popcorn, plastic baggies, cleaners, deodorant, cat food, candy, soda, cereal, soap, flavored water, and more. If I coordinated my coupons with sales just right, I could easily get $100 worth of groceries for under $5, and I did it often. I knew the sale cycles and I watched the coupon previews. My house, and my mother's storage building, was brimming over. I'd get so much that I would give it away to family. I knew so much about couponing, I taught classes about it to try to help others. The couponing project was going great. But other things were happening.

For one thing, it didn't affect my grocery budget very much. I was getting more but spending the same amount of money because there aren't many, if any, coupons for fruits, vegetables, and meat. I was also gaining weight faster than a new baby. In 6 years of marriage, I put on 55 pounds. My skin was sensitive and drying out, my hair was ragged and breaking off, and my allergies were constantly going crazy. My husband wasn't in much better shape. Even the cat was having health problems and was put on a prescription diet.

Here's the problem with couponing: nothing you get is healthy. The food is loaded with salt, sugar, and chemical preservatives. The health and beauty products are full of sulfates, chlorine, ammonia, and parabens. And we won't even go into what's in the cleaning products. All of these things were making me, and my husband, sick. There is a lot of truth in the statement "you are what you eat," and eating a diet full of free Hamburger Helper and Chex Mix was turning me into something I didn't like. Couponing also complicated my life.I had to plan for hours just to go on a shopping trip. I had to research sales and drag my family from store to store. It was a job, and I didn't feel like I needed another job.

I never officially gave up couponing; I just did less and less as I realized what products were a danger to me. I still carry some coupons, but they are mostly for natural products that I feel are still beneficial. I've found new ways that make me feel better and really do save money. And I will be writing a lot about them very soon.

Confessions of a Sale Addict

I don't want to look like this anymore!

I have too much stuff. Way too much stuff. It's not that my house is overflowing with knick knacks or that my closets won't shut - I just can't handle clutter very well, and if something isn't used a lot or loved, it's clutter to me. Now I consider myself an expert at de-cluttering - I've even taught classes on it. I can clean out a closet and organize it in no time. But that's only the solution to the problem.  I need to get to the root of my problem: shopping. Or more specifically, clearance sales.

I love a good sale. I love finding nice things 75% or 90% off the original price. And that's another thing of which I consider myself an expert. I know when and where all of the seasonal sales are, I know which stores have the best selections, and I know how to use a coupon to get something even cheaper. I once found myself in Target wheeling out 3 carts full of toys for my daughter and niece, and I paid less than $100 for a lot of nice things. Key words: a lot.

My house already has everything I need, so why am I always on the hunt for more? Because it's a thrill. I feel like I've won a battle if I can get a Christmas wreath that was originally $30 for just $7.50. But I do I need it? No. I don't. I have boxes full of Christmas decorations. I don't need more sheets, frying pans, candles, blankets, or picture frames. My daughter doesn't need any more toys, and my husband doesn't need any more video games. And yet I return to the stores because that's what I've always done for fun. But it's time to stop.

I've de-cluttered my house more times than I can count. And I'll do it again this year. But here's the difference. This year I pledge to buy less so the de-cluttering will remain effective. I know, easier said than done. But here's how I'm going to do it:

Limit my shopping trips. If I'm not in a store, I can't buy things. Like many people, I run to the store if I'm out of 1 or 2 things. Unless it's a true emergency, like if Prairie Girl needs medicine, I'm going to limit my store errands to once a week.

Make lists of needs and wants. I'm going to list what we really need in the house and what I want. If we need something and it's on the list, I won't feel guilty buying it. If I just want something, I'm going to wait and think about it.

Ask myself questions. For each item that is on the "want" list, I'm going to ask myself 3 questions: 1) How will I use it? 2) Do I already own something like it? 3) Will I use it/keep it for a long time?

This mission isn't about money. I believe in in living frugally and saving money, but this is about clutter versus simplicity. Simplicity makes me happy. Cleaning, moving, and storing stuff, no matter how cheap it was, doesn't make me happy.

As the year progresses, I'll check in and let you know what I'm doing instead of shopping. I know my family is excited about the prospect of free Saturdays and fewer Wal-Mart trips. Now surely I'm not the only one with too much stuff. What about you?